Dear Phimugirl:

The wedding-day toast, traditionally the responsibility of the best man alone, today is often given by both the bride's and groom's honor attendants. Sometimes the best man and maid of honor will coordinate their toasts into a "joint act" of sorts. But more often, one simply follows the other, usually with the best man going first.

The primary purpose of the toast is to wish the happy couple good luck and good fortune in their marriage. Unlike rehearsal dinner toasts, which allow for some good-natured roasting, wedding toasts should be more sentimental and reserved. Your toast can be as short and sweet as two or three lines, which you can write yourself or borrow from the Bible, a poetry book, literature and so on. Or you might prefer to fashion your toast into a short story several paragraphs long. In this case, try to give guests a window into your relationship with the bride and share your good feelings about her new life with the groom. It's important that you limit your toast to three to five minutes, since holding court for much longer can cause the crowd to grow restless.

If your toast is on the short side, you can start by inviting guests to rise (if they haven't already) and raise their glasses to the happy couple. Or you can simply ask everyone to raise their glasses and toast the bride and groom at the end of your speech. Once you're finished, make your way to the bride and groom to give them each a handshake, hug or kiss.

Good luck,

The Wedding Women