Every year, hundreds of brides report in on the money fights they're having with their families and fiances regarding wedding plans. Here's the reason: Money equals power, control and love. In order to break the emotional hold money has on you and your family members when it comes to your wedding, you've got to put everyone on even footing. Just because, say, your dad is contributing more than you are shouldn't mean he has more say than you do in the plans. That said, everyone who contributes should have his or her opinions and ideas respectfully considered, and implemented whenever possible.

Here's a stress-relieving strategy: Open a checking account, as early as possible in the wedding-planning process, and earmark it strictly for wedding-related expenses. Ask everyone who has plans to contribute to your wedding costs to designate an amount he or she feels comfortable with and deposit a check into this account. Once the money is pooled, there's no chance of your mom's taking control of the flowers, for example, because she "paid for them," or your mother-in-law nixing your song selection because her check is paying the band bill. When everything is paid for out of this one account, everyone's money goes toward the larger cause.

Designate one person (you, the father of the bride, etc.) to manage the account, do all the check writing and pay all the bills. If there's any money left over in the account after the wedding (it's not likely!), you can keep it, give everyone a "rebate" or invite everyone to dinner at a restaurant and use the remainder to pay the bill.

If, by chance, your family members aren't willing to mix their money, you're going to have to make a tough choice: Either let them control what they want (if control is what they're after; plenty of generous wedding bill payers don't actually care how their money is spent, they merely want to help you pull off your big day) or politely decline their money, pay the bills yourselves and be able to call all the shots.

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