Looking for advice on how to negotiate with caterers, florists, bands and the slew of other professionals you need to hire to make your wedding dreams a reality? This excerpt from Anti-Bride Guide: Tying the Knot Outside of the Box offers tips on how you can stay within your budget and still get what you want without turning into a dreaded bridezilla. Start here:
Sure, you're an ace party thrower. But planning your wedding may be the first time you've engaged professional help. Whether you're booking a caterer, a baker, a florist, a band or a photographer, you want to get what you want. And the nicest way to do this is to be a good client. This doesn't mean being a pushover; after all, much of what you're paying for is peace of mind. Professional services should deliver what you have asked for, on time and on budget. Unlike wheedling your Uncle Steve to cook up 30 pounds of his famous barbecued ribs, you are hiring people to provide what you need, not asking them for a favor.
Be aware, too, that wedding services can cost a lot, and many little details (from renting glassware to hiring valet parkers) can add hundreds of dollars to your overall costs. A good client is one who knows what she wants, knows her budget, and knows where the two will reasonably intersect. Do some shopping around first, and find out the typical price range for the sorts of services you'll need. Caterers, for example, charge by the head, which means that a big, super-festive loft party for two hundred could end up eating up a large chunk of change if you insist on filling every table with huge trays of sushi. Don't feel intimidated about stating your budget up front; if a caterer or supplier is truly out of your range, see if they can suggest someone else. If you really want to work with a particular firm, see what options they offer. Could they do a casual buffet instead of a sit-down dinner? What about small, seasonal bouquets instead of cascades of white roses? A little flattery never hurts; if you present your wedding as a creative challenge, you may get something much better than you expected. Then again, you may end up with carnations and chips and dip. Go with your gut instincts; don't sign any contracts unless you're absolutely sure you're going to get what you want.
As a recent groom told us, "Don't get suckered into package deals. A lot of times the sales technique is to convince you that you're not in your right mind at the moment, and if you don't go with what they are selling you right then, you will regret it the rest of your life. Don't buy it. There are as many photographers and caterers as there are days before your wedding. Find one who doesn't pressure you." Professionals should be professional; you have every right to expect phone calls to be returned and e-mails and faxes answered. At the same time, remember that you are not this person's only client. It may be your wedding, but to your florist or caterer, it's just one of many jobs. "Bridezilla" is the ugly but apt term used by those in the business for those monster clients who wig out about every little thing. Don't let yourself turn into a bridezilla. No one does his or her best work for a screamer. You're hiring people because they know their jobs; let them do their jobs.
To save all kinds of trouble in the long run, put your agreement in writing. Everything, from the name of the person delivering and setting up the cake to the number of hours you're expecting the band to play, should be specified in the contracts. Keep copies of all of the contracts on file, and assign someone to bring copies to the wedding itself should any last-minute complications arise.
Click here for another excerpt of the Anti-Bride Guide about how to avoid hiring a florist, caterer or bandleader from Hell.
